Well I guess you have every right to be pissed at me for calling you Sandman, but honestly, did we need to push my cat off the roof? You fucking fuck head.
I'm going to be 39 in a few days, my goal is set to quit smoking and now you break my cat... I don't know if I should love you as I recognize this to be one of the biggest tests of my year, or if I should continue to curse at you for throwing this on top of the spin...
3am... I'm at the emergency vet hospital and they can't do anything but give him pain stuff until the normal vet gets in...
"Looks like his leg is broken, but it's too swollen for us to know. Call your vet in the morning and make sure she gets these xrays..."
Hands me a wod of pain med syringes and says good luck.
You ever heard a 22 pound cat howl in that kind of pain... and you ever try moving him at 3am all by yourself? I get home finally, we're in the house, he's drugged up and I fall to the ground in tears.
"...oh my fucking gawd... what's happening? Is this a blessing or did I catch some bad karma somehow? Crying, crying, mind crying, thinking, blurry crying, heart breaking crying, my CAT! YOU FUCKING ASSHOLES! I DON'T GIVE A SHIT IF YOU'RE GOD, GOD'S HELPER, GAWDS BAD FUCKING JOKE OR WHAT... but do you hear my cat crying??? You fucking ass!!!..."
======= The Next Business Day - at the Vet ===============
you're kidding me!
"I wish I could give you better news, but those are our options... The knee is completely blown, but I believe it can be repaired...blah blah blah..."
(mind bubble - the only thing that was in my mind at this point was that the repair bill was a four figure dot zero zero number....blinking blinking red red red....)
"Leave him here overnight and think about it..."
That night I resolve to sell the Spyder, not go to Mexico (I had a tentative trip scheduled) and fix my cat. I might be broke, but two cars, I don't need... my cat, I want. The surgery is scheduled.
"Well, the good news is that the surgery went well and we were able to reconstruct the knee. The 'kind of' bad news is that your little KC is quite the feisty thing and refuses to stay still... and it's critical we keep him still for the next six weeks and especially the next three until the stitches are out...blah blah blah care instructions, care instructions blah blah blah"
blink blink blink.... did she say six weeks?
"... and the reason he has no cast is because he ripped it off of himself just minutes after he came out of anesthesia... it surprised us all for sure.... by the time we got in there, he had the cast off and the cone off his head...blah blah blah... you'll have to keep him immobile.... blah... kennel large enough for him to live in but not move in.... blah blah...."
blinking blinking blinking.... six weeks of this?
"... three times a day in the mouth for pain and these are twice for.... blah blah blah... and that total comes to $2513.00... blah blah ... call us any time if you have any questions...."
======================================
I do all this and KC and I live in the kennel (big enough for a dog say 60 pounds or so) for the next three weeks. It's looking good, the knee isn't swollen anymore and it doesn't look like his toes are crammed up into his ear anymore... I don't think he'll even have a limp....
========The day before stitches due out=========
"MEEEOOOOOWWWWWWW....!!!!!"
Okay, what the fuck is that.... I run down the hall, look into the room at KC and his knee is the size of a watermelon... What the fuck!!!!! I call the vet emergency style....
"...what happened?"
I have no idea what happened Dr. Headlin - I only know that last night it was perfect knee and today it's the size of a large potato....
"...bring him right now." THANK YOU!
"...I have no idea how he managed this but he's blown the surgery... entirely. Our options are these... blah blah blah...."
Breathe..... just breathe.... blink back tears and breathe... (mind chatter - you're gonna have to put your cat to sleep).... breathe...
"...and this time, I think we should keep him here for the first week before you take him home... I think my plan is to keep him REALLY drugged up so he stays still for sure, but I'd feel more comfortable if we did that rather then have you apply that amount of medication....blah blah blah....there is a bit of a risk with it....but I think the knee can be repaired one more time... it seems to be a clean break... the stitches didn't actually give way, the bone broke instead... blah blah blah...."
Breathe..... just breathe.... blink back tears and breathe... (mind chatter - you're gonna have to put your cat to sleep).... breathe...
"... I know we discussed your finances last time, but I really think we can fix him....blah...."
Dr. Headlin... please stop. I can't do this, so I'd like to just go home, leave him here and get myself together enough to say good bye to him tomorrow... okay?
"... think about it... maybe I can talk to the surgeon and work some things out...."
Thank you Dr.
====== The Next Day on the phone with the Doctor ========
"... the surgeon was generous enough to offer a second surgery for free.... I can help with donating the kennel cost, but you will still have to pay for the medications, we can't do anything about those...."
Another $1300.00 later, we restart six weeks....
At the Vet's office, just before I leave him again...
may I have a word with my cat please....
"... certainly."
KC... look at me. Stop fucking around. I KNOW that you can hear me and I KNOW that you know last time I had a car to sell, but this time, I don't. This is the last of my CC space and we're fucked if you don't let her fix you this time. Do you hear me you little rat bastard? We have this Chance ONE MORE TIME... if you don't want to co-operate and if you fuck this next surgery up... I'm going to kill you. Take that quite seriously please.... as I don't want to do that. This time the choice is yours my dear.... turn the 'survival instinct' on kitten and HEAR me.... one more time....
=======================================
Today, August 3.2008
KC walks with no limp, both cats are indoors and somehow, I ended up with a dog in November, but that's another story... back to August 2007...
